We believe in the Freedom of [the majority] Religion [to override the freedom of the non- or minority-religion].

Three people want to understand you. They are eager and interested, and they ask many questions. The questions are very similar, and the experiences feel equally flattering.

What’s hard to see from your position, however, is that each is actually doing something very different.

The first is trying to find out what you think about them. They are self-absorbed and have a hard time caring about others. They are insecure and want to control their image.

The second is trying to find out what’s wrong with you. They are distrustful and judgemental. They are looking for ammunition to validate their condemnation of you.

Only the third matches what you thought all three were doing. They are curious and want to connect with you. They want to make sense of you and to justify you as you are.

What’s especially confusing though is that they aren’t three people, but rather three competing agendas within most anyone who asks you questions about yourself.

Daily headline:
White, Privileged, Heterosexual Man Denies Racism, Inequity, Hate, and Sexism in America

The optimist sees the world with only one eye opened. The pessimist sees the world with only the other. The realist sees with both, and by acknowledging the one or the other, is seen as being only the other by the one.

People like it best when you describe yourself honestly and them dishonestly.

My general philosophy is that your actions ARE NOT your fault (consequences of your genes and circumstances which are the consequence of other’s genes and circumstances which all existed long before you were born), but that they ARE your responsibility (it’s not fair, but it seems like the best way to function well together and to reduce suffering).

Consider watching the Will Smith video on fault vs responsibility if you need a little more convincing.

Anyway, I’m realizing that maybe the reason people seem to struggle so much with this perspective in this heavily Christian influenced society is because Christianity teaches the opposite: Your actions ARE your fault (sin, shame, you should feel awful, repent, etc), but they ARE NOT your responsibility (only Jesus can save you from them).

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